Spare by Prince Harry is an outstanding memoir. As someone who has long admired him, I am glad he finally had the opportunity to tell his story in his own words. Prior to reading the book, I was unfamiliar with the true meaning behind the term “spare.” I knew that Prince Charles had once told Princess Diana he had successfully produced “an heir and a spare,” and I had always assumed it simply meant that Harry would step into the line of succession should anything happen to William. However, Harry’s account revealed a far more painful reality. He writes, “I was summoned to provide backup, distraction, diversion and, if necessary, a spare part. Kidney, perhaps. Blood transfusion. Speck of bone marrow.” He also reflects, “Two years older than me, Willy was the Heir, whereas I was the Spare,” conveying the unsettling idea that he existed in part as a biological reserve for his brother.
I believe Harry never truly felt loved by his father in the way he might have been had he been born a girl — a second daughter instead of a second son. I am not saying Charles didn’t love Harry, only that Charles could have loved Harry just a little more.
At a recent event, host Ayesha Hazarika introduced him by saying, “He wants to say a few words to kick start the day and he’s made it clear that we are all just to call him ‘Harry.’ So, ladies and gentlemen, please give a big Scottish welcome to Harry.” It speaks to his desire to be seen simply as himself — Harry. Just Harry.
I absolutely loved his book. His story made me feel deeply for both him and Prince William. I was reminded of the sorrow I felt when I read Princess Diana’s book years ago, wondering how being burdened with the well-being and survival of an entire country and commonwealth could ever be worth the personal cost. Harry’s pain, his sense of not belonging in his own family, echoes the struggles his mother endured.
I sincerely hope he is finding peace here in California. As a fan, I even find myself wishing he and his family would move to Newport Coast — maybe then I might have the chance to meet him. In my daydreams, I imagine that with a little help from Ben striking up a conversation with “Just Harry,” about their military experience, we might even become good friends, perhaps over a casual coffee.
I highly recommend this book. It is eye-opening, informative, and at times both humorous and heartwarming, offering a perspective that allows readers to see the royal family in a new and more nuanced light — whether for better or for worse.